Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Bat?
by Ezereal
Summary: Riddler shows up again, this time telling Crane that if he solves his Riddles, he'll reveal Batman's true identity. But, before he can even say enough to give Crane a hint, Batman himself swoops in and takes the Riddler away with him. Sequel to 'Riddle Me This, Scarecrow'. Riddler/Scarecrow
1. Chapter 1

**This is the sequel to 'Riddle Me This, Scarecrow'. You don't really have to read the previous story to read this, but I recommend it, since it mentions the events that occur. Again, thanks goes out to Tay Mythological for helping with the plot line, and ZenyZootSuit for motivating me to write a sequel!**

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Today, I woke up. At least it was in my own bed, unlike yesterday. I had been... Er, kidnapped by Edward Nigma, The Riddler, and was forced to answer his riddles in order to escape from his clutches. I got to the end, and was surprised by receiving a kiss from Nigma. We then went our separate ways, and I came back here. I swung my legs over the end of the bed, smoothing up my bed-head hair as much as I could right now. I didn't really have many plans for today, other than to make something to eat then head out to meet with the Joker and our little group of villains. All enemies of Batman, for the most part.

I walked languidly to the lonely, bare kitchen, where I fixed up a bowl of cereal and slices of toast (which ended up becoming terribly charred, as I cannot even work a toaster). I sat down to eat, and ate very, very quickly. This probably wasn't good for my stomach... When I finished, I tossed my dirtied dishes into the sink, and unhurriedly walked to the bathroom to fix myself up before our meeting. Brushed my teeth, combed my hair, and slid on my mask.

When all that was done, and I was all clean and tidy, I strolled out to the front door, twisting the doorknob. Strange- it wasn't opening, and the thing to lock and unlock the door was not working. I went to the back of the house to try the other door, but that plan rolled downhill like an avalanche. I stared out the window, as if it would make some strange idea spark in my brain that would allow me to somehow get out of the house, but staring right back at me was none other than Nigma himself. I slid off my mask- there was no use for that now.

"Hello, Jonny-boy!" he announced. That aggravating tone of his voice came through a set of speakers, cleverly mounted atop my bookshelf.

"Nigma," I growled, glaring daggers back at him. "Have you really stooped low enough this time to lock me in my own house?!"

"That hurts, Jonny. That really hurts," he pouted, his voice going up an octave, trying to make me take pity on him.

"Is this another one of your games?"

"Ooh, how clever! You know me so well, my dear. Of course. I have a few riddles for you to answer, and-"

"No more riddles! I'm sick and tired of you messing with me! Are you wanting me to gas you?!"

"Please be quiet, and let me talk. As I was saying, if you get them right- most of them, at least- I will reveal to you Batman's true identity..."

"You... You know who he is?" I asked him. I was very surprised- even _I, _a great _psychologist, _could not deduce who the Dark Knight really was underneath that mask.

"Why, of course I do! Are you telling me that the great Professor Jonathan Crane himself doesn't know? Obviously, I already knew that. If I didn't, I wouldn't be here and you wouldn't be locked up in your own home," he said with a slight chuckle to his voice. "Are you agreeing to answer to my riddles?"

"Are you going to tell the truth this time? By that, I mean not just letting me into another room- actually letting me out and telling me what you promise?"

"I promise. Cross my heart, hope to die."

"Fine. Just get it over with, please?"

"Alrighty~!" he said, excitement filling his already eager voice. "Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one, Michael J. Fox has a small one, Madonna doesn't have one, the pope has one but he doesn't use it, and Bill Clinton has one and he uses it all the time. What is it?"

My eyebrow raised at this riddle. "Nigma," I began, "is it supposed to sound... dirty?"

"Dirty? What do you mean, dirty? It's not dirty, I promise you. Cross my heart and hope to die twice!"

"It sure sounded like it..." What does Schwarzenegger have that's big? Big feet? That man's big... But if we are talking about feet here, Madonna wouldn't fit in. She sure does have feet, as far as I know. I glanced up at the window again, and Nigma had his face and hands pressed up against the glass, staring intently at me. He stuck his tongue out, as if trying to let me know that I would never figure it out.

I shook my head, signaling to him that he was right, I couldn't get this one.

"Are you seriously stuck on this? Gosh, Crane. This is one of the riddles that'll make you feel stupid when you finally find out the answer. It's a surname. Get it? Hm?"

"I get it, Nigma. I get it."

"Don't be such a sourpuss, Jonny! How 'bout this one: A man is lying face down, dead, in the desert. What happened?"

"He died, obviously."

"Alright, smarty pants! That's not the answer. Well, partly. He is dead. But I'll give you a hint- what would be inside the backpack?"

"There was probably food and water, but he probably ran out and either died of exhaustion, starvation, or dehydration." I loved making smart aleck remarks around him- It really screwed with his head and made him angry, which was actually pretty entertaining.

"Jonathan Crane, please stop. Be serious here."

"I am. It's logic, after all."

"Okay! Pretend there's no logic in this game! You're beginning to sound like me... Did we switch personalities or something?!"

"No logic? Alright- a group of evil space aliens from the planet Uranus came down in a giant spaceship made by the aliens on Neptune, and shot the man with wicked space lasers and he died."

Riddler slammed his fist on the glass, luckily it didn't break. "Stop!"

"Okay. Something else that would be in the backpack... Parachute? Was he parachuting out of an airplane, but it failed and he fell to his death?"

"Ding ding, that is correct!" he shouted, the happiness returning to his face.

"What is up with you and airplanes being involved in people's deaths? Anyway, are the riddles over? I had an important meeting to go to, and, as always, I have formulas to perfect and new ones to create. How about you become my new test subject? Hm?"

"No thank you... I'll make this one the last. If you can get this right, his identity is revealed to you, for your ears only. If you get it wrong, I get to live with you for a week."

A week? Even being around him for just _five minutes _is torture. I can't imagine what it would be like for a week... "Fine. Just get on with it- I want out of my own house."

"How much dirt is in a whole three acres square and two hundred feet deep?"

"A hole? It has no dirt, because it's a hole, obviously..."

"Ding ding!" The sound of a lock undoing itself sounded like heaven to my ears. I threw open the door and dashed outside into the sunlight, nearly crashing head-on into Nigma. He pulled me into another kiss, one which I just stood there until he stepped away. "Good job, Jonny-boy. Now, about Batman. His true identity is-"

I jumped back in terror as a black gloved hand cupped itself around Nigma's mouth, muffling his voice. Nigma's eyes showed an expression like he was asking for help as his hands struggled to pull away the other that was keeping him from talking. I looked up, and the masked man himself was holding onto Nigma.

"Nobody will know," he declared in his raspy, growly voice. "That will be assured." Those were the last words that were spoken to me that day, and the last I would see of Edward Nigma for a long, long while.

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**Haha, I did change around Tay's idea just a bit. Maybe a lot, but oh well. Hope you liked it, whoever may be reading this.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I just felt the previous chapter ended with a sort of cliffhanger, and needed a new ending. I've done a switch here, and made an attempt at Riddler's POV... Hope I do alright. I gladly take requests, so drop me a message anytime~!**

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The night was dark and dreary- at least it seemed like it, with all we could see through the small windows. Nobody was able to get any rest. Everyone was on their feet, looking restless and worried for all sorts of reasons. But as for me... I was standing outside, dodging prison guards and avoiding being seen.

I don't know ho long it took me to get out- it was just a very long time. In my mind, Arkham is a terrible place. Hopefully everyone else thought the same thing... Maybe not the Joker, since he can go in and out of Arkham at will. Maybe he likes it, and just does it for fun... Anyway, how far was this from Jonny's home? Or my home, even? No matter. I just pushed on and headed in the direction I knew Jonny would be in.

I guessed it was a few hours worth of walking, with many long breaks on the way. I mean _a lot. _You wouldn't believe how sore my feet were. The sun was just beginning to come up on the horizon, and I stood outside his front door. I opened it, prepared to meet the enraged tone of my little Scarecrow yelling at me, but what happened was completely different than anything I had in mind.

I took in a deep breath, but something seemed... odd. I was met with a strange scent, and the air around me had a slight brownish ting to it. I glanced toward the ceiling, desperately hoping for someone or something to help me get through this. It felt as if hundreds of gallons of water were pouring in through the windows and door. Just moments later, everything went black. From there, I don't know what happened.

I woke up gasping for breath, being held in Jonny's long, skinny arms. "There was... Water, and... And..."

"Shh," Jonathan mumbled, pressing a finger to my lips to make me be quiet. "You're fine now, Nigma. I just had a mishap with the fear toxin."

"Wait... What?!" I jolted up, only to be stopped by Jonny's hand being firmly pressed onto my chest. "Sorry... What happened?"

"A canister of the fear toxin fell off my desk and cracked, filling the entire room and more with the gas. Fortunately, I got a mask o in time, but you _had _to walk in at just the wrong moment."

"I am gonna be okay, right, Jonny?" I asked worriedly, slinging my arms around his neck.

"You'll be just fine," he stated. "I gave you the antidote that has been developed."

"You better have," I joked, standing up. "Well, I have great news. I escaped from Arkham! Aren't you proud, Jonny-boy?"

"Yes, finally someone like you has escaped from within the bowels of the world's greatest asylum! I am just shocked! However did you do it?"

"Thank you, Sergeant Sarcasm," I mumbled. "I'm going to stay here tonight, Jonny. No kicking me out."

"I don't think I can kick you out... You'll just come running back. Like a boomerang."

"I don't know if you noticed, but I am clearly not Captain Boomerang."

"I know. Masks and spandex wouldn't really look good on him."

"Are you saying _I _look good in spandex?"

"Personally, I like your suit and hat better. Spandex isn't very appealing," Jonathan said with a roll of his eyes. "Not even on you, Nigma."

"I'm... Appealing to you?" I asked, joy filling my voice.

"Nope. Never will be."

"That's a lie."

"You're right, it's a lie. You caught me," he teased, putting his hands up.

I leaned in and gave him a peck on the cheek, smiling. "Caught you."


End file.
